rest in peace...

5 min b4 exam...mama msg...suh kol die cepat2...bunyi cm urgent je...wat aku cuak...then aku kol....

"pah wan dh meninggal..."

"hah???!ble???"

"kul 7 pg td...terkilan gak coz xg tgk die smlm coz angah bru pas kuar hospital...so skang ni xtau sape nk jge angah...ko ngah exam kan..."

"owh..xpela...kalo cmtu pas exam along blik la jge angah..tgglkan kunci kt umah.."

"ko nk blik nek ape??"

"nek ktm la..then nek bas.."

"eh...xyah2...hmm...xpela...jwb exam elok2...jgn susah2 hati...ayah ngn mama nk g umah pah wan ni.."

"owh...okeyh2.."

then after da end of da conversation...aku pn trus msuk dewan kuliah jwb exam...

sedih 2 xsedih pn...coz die xsyg aku cm die syg cucu2 die yg mmg xgne lgsg 2....yg tau nk kikis harta n duit die je...so....aku wonder...drama ape yg akan berlaku kt umah opah skang...hmmm...msti emas2 sume 2 dh diamek oleh rosnah(ex menantu die yg gler harta) n ckp ni sume milik yaya n zack(cucu yg xkenang budi lgsg) waris die.....


susah tol idop ngn owg gler harta ni...

da "L" word...

smtimes....leaving someone is da best way....
coz 4 their own good....

he's too good 4 me....

maybe he deserved someone better....
someone who could understand him better....

yup....
he's too good 4 me.......
i really do love him....with all my heart.......but smtimes....letting someone u love...is da best....

he can get his own life back....
without thinking bout me anymore....

at least....
die xkn kecik kan hati mak die lagi.....

to effa n ika...niena..am..kip n shire..imah...icha..farrah..sha n cidot..n great fren, fahmi..;)

khamis dhla nk exam...tp aku xabeh study lg ni....gler ke pe aku ni...well...tp 2 la hakikatnye yg terjd kt aku since aku msuk upm ni...xtau nape...tp aku rase cm half of myself hilang since aku msuk upm....ade owg happy dpt msuk u n jmpe kgkwn bru....life bru...n psgn bru....tp bukan aku...xtau nape...maybe aku terlalu hold myself 2 start a new life or...i dun have anyone 2 start wif...or maybe ni sume alasan aku...argh!!aku xtau....nk cari jwpn pn aku rase aku ttp xkn dpt jwpn yg akan puaskan hati aku...n guess what....smpai skang aku rindu life aku kt matriks...coz life kt sane was like a sweet dream 2 remember...full of colours....full of surprises...kt cni....aku sgt9 dull....aku rindu effa n ika...diorg slalu je wat bnde2 yg akan ceriakan suasane...bsuh kipas la...wat video la....tgk muvi la...[smpai aku ngamok...hehe...soorrryyyy sgt9 korg....;)] n am, niena, kip n shire...sume pale otak xbtol...shire ngn mata yg terlalu mggoda...hahahahaha...niena xabeh2 ngan diary die...lgu die...gitar die...n COKLAT die of course!![aku la tukang habiskan stok coklat die....ske skali..~~~~~] am n kip plak....hmmm...am dulu ade krisis nk ngorat pmpuan....asyek xdpt je...cian die...yg kip...best gitar's player ever...aku ske tgk die men gitar...kalo jd boypren pn besh aku pk...hahaha...tp niena yg dpt...so aku doakan yg terbaek wat mereka....aku?????muhammad nur faid je yg mampu tawan hati aku after clash ngn azri...;)

now....

life had b so much different....aku xtau la nape jd cmni...maybe sbb kami2 dah grown into smbody or masing2 sudah sesat dalam dunia yg diorg ske atau pn x...effa dh jd org yg die nk jd aku rase...die nk amek tesl n die dpt....aku bangga ngn die....go gurl!!;) am plak....die amek course yg related ngan ikan2 ni...n ngan gembiranya die dh dpt calon isteri utk idup die akan dtg...tp xabeh2 gdoh je...haish....niena n kip plak...hmm......so much 2 say bout their life....but now...niena happy ngn life die...die amek it...msuk brassband...n happy wif her new frenz..n kisah cnta die...kip plak....amek chem engineering rasenye....after dh clash ngn niena...idop die kelam kabot n slalu gak kaco aku tgh2 mlm....but...pastu...die dh mghilang....aku xtau die watpe skang....hope die okeyh....aku?????skang kt upm...blaja biochem...[nmpak je senang...tp dh amek...ahaahahaha...bru tau!!!]kekasih hati????die g belayar kt jepon...or korea...sedih kne tggl sowg2 kt cni....tp nk wat cmne....he had chose dis path...n i had chosen da path 2 b wif him...nk atau x...aku kne trime....

so....

recently aku kne tendang kolej....hmm...mls nk cite byk2..coz wat aku sakit hati....

skang ni....while writting dis blog...aku smmgnye rindukan niena....coz she's da 1 yg aku btol2 syg as kwn....coz she made a huge impact in my life actually...tgk die happy ngn kerol...ntahla....jelez pn ade...tp is gud 4 her la...at least she's happy...;) nk rndu am pn...xleh....kang yati(awek am) jelez kt aku..haish....yati2...aku xde feeling pn kt si am 2...juz anggap as abg aku jer...yg kekdg otak die pn xbtol gak...shire....rindu nk bring2 kt ko kalo ngantok dlm kuliah...rindu gler nk plok2 ko time aku ngh beku kt kuliah....hmmm....

almost 1 year dah aku msuk upm....but da memory of da 4 of them was clearly fresh in my mind....if i have a car...n a lot of money....aku akan g jmpe diorg...coz aku rindu gler kt diorg....aku xtau la diorg rndu aku ke x....smtimes...aku tpk gak bnde 2....tp...jwpn die xde kt aku...n aku mls nk cari jwpn kt diorg....if they miss me...i'll b happy...;)

utk fahmi....
thanx coz jd kwn yg sgt bergune utk aku....syg ko lebih la!!;p

xlupe gak 2 imah...icha...sha..farrah...n cidot..
korg mmg roxstar la!!hehe..coz korg wat pe je yg korg nk...xkire la pe pn org ckp pasal korg....korg mmg kwn plg gler aku pnah ade..;)

utk kgkwn aku kt upm.....
thanx coz bg nasihat kt aku....n tolong aku...;)

what would it b...

what would it b..

if...

they were different...

would i b da same as i am today...

what would it b..

if...

i know u later...

or sooner...

would i b da same as i am today...

i don't know...

i don't know...

but...

what i do know is...

i'm grateful 2 b born in dis life...

even sometimes there were thorns along da way...

but i'm still walk thru it...

hang on upon it...

n i'm still survived...

even when it hurt so much...

even when i can't take da pain no more...

even when i feel breathless n restless...

dis is my path...

my life...

i can choose 2 b different...

but why would i b different...

can different makes someone like u...

or can it b otherwise....

u..urself r da one dat only can make da decision...